#60 The Positive Power of One THANK YOU! (19/01/03)

The Message

By Dr. Robert H. Schuller

It is an amazing thing how this simple word, "thank you" can open doors and take the place of other words when you don't know what to say. When I travel to other countries that are non-English speaking I first learn the word "thank you" in their language. In Japanese it's "aliato." In Chinese, it's "xie xie." In Korean, it's "kan sa hi mi da." In Russian it's "spasibo" ... Dutch is "dank u wel" ... German is "vielen dank."

I just came home from Australia a few days ago and there I asked, "What is 'thank you' in Australia? Is it the same as in America?" "No, in Australia we say 'thanks mate!"

Thank You is a Wonder-Working Word

I've discovered that if "thank you" is the only word I speak in a foreign language, it does wonders. When you can say "thank you" in their language they seem so pleased. Thank you is a wonder-working word. So learn it in whatever language you can, but maybe we better learn it in our own language first. For most of us that is English. Because I thank many people have yet to really learn to say and live "thank you" in their own native tongue.

"Thank you" is one of the most positive emotionally generating words you and I communicate. So let's look together at the positive power of one thank you. It is phenomenal. It works wonders because it penetrates into the subconscious and can change moods. It can alter personalities from morose to merry. Let's begin by reading these words from St. Timothy:

"For every creature of God is good and nothing is to be refused if it is received with thanksgiving."
(1 Timothy 4:4)

Yes, we all need to learn on how to live "thanksgiving" and how to say "thanksgiving." This is very, very, very important because thanksgiving releases the emotions of gratitude in the human heart. And, when you release the positive emotions of gratitude that does wonders to immunize your optimism from infectious pessimism, which is all around you and me. There is nothing more important than we maintain emotional health, spiritual health, and mental health by remaining optimistic.

The Church Is The Place for Optimism

Our world is a cynical world, and the church is the only institution that tries to build people's optimism. You can attend any university or any department in any college in the world and you won't find a major in "optimism." But that's what the church, as an institution, has been doing for a couple of thousand years. If you think the church is probably going to go out of style and the gospel won't mean much in the future, you're wrong. The church is the only institution that is designed to make you optimistic and keep you optimistic, because the exercise of gratitude is so very fundamental and important.

So how do you and I exercise gratitude? How do we say, "thank you"? Here are a few simple thoughts for you to think about. They are very basic.

1) Keep your "thank you" simple

First of all, in expressing thanksgiving, keep your "thank you" simple. Just say "thank you very much." And don't add any negative words like ... but. I'm amazed at how many people put the "but" after the thank you. Parents to their children, "Oh, thank you for doing the dishes, but ... now do your homework." Or wives to their husbands or husbands to their wives, spouses to each other, "Thank you very much, but ..."

Keep it simple and don't hang anything else on it. Don't let anything else clutter it up. It is not a pause where you can add other advice that you'd like to give. Keep your "thank you" simple.

2) Keep your "thank you" clean ... without guilt

I mean keep your "thank you" clean, don't pollute it. There are people who pollute their gratitude with guilt. Many people, in fact, who express gestures or words of thanksgiving are motivated by guilt more than they are by a deep gratitude. We all know the story of the man who brings chocolates to his wife when it's not an anniversary or birthday. Saying, "Well, I just love you very much." And she replies, "Okay, what did you do this time?" I hope he isn't feeling guilty. It's very easy for gratitude and guilt to get mixed up. So keep your "thank you" clean.

3) Be serious about your "thank you"

I don't think anything is more important in your emotional life and your expressions than gratitude and thanksgiving because everybody needs a thank you. We all need affirmation all the time. It's not just the people who are at the bottom of the ladder (as they would describe themselves, more often than not, incorrectly) but everybody needs to hear a "thank you." The people who are successful surely need a "thank you." You see, the nice thing about a thank you is that you are not describing their performance, you are describing their personhood. We need affirmation of our personhood more than we do our performance. You know if you've performed adequately, but what do people think of you? How do they see you? What are their secret opinions? A "thank you" will go a long way. Yes, the positive power of one thank you will do wonders to revive people who are beginning to slowly go downhill in their self image because of the offenses to which we are all exposed to in the world. Be serious. We all need to receive a "thank you."

Give and Take "Thank You's"

You and I need to not only receive, but we need to give thank you's. When we give a "thank you" to others, we have no way of knowing how we have encouraged someone at a secret time when they were low in their heart. We have no idea. I can look at my life in about ten different phases when I encountered someone who said something positive to me, more often than not, in a college or university or in daily life, in the hallway, not in a formal meeting, not in a classroom setting, but it was an off-the-cuff comments made in the hallway of life that impacted me. That's where a simple "thank you" can make all the difference in the world. You can also say "thank you" with a touch. A touch of a handshake. We all need to give a "thank you" and we all need to accept a "thank you."

Yes, thanksgiving in daily life is a give and take thing. You give it, but you also have to take it. The Bible says,

"It is more blessed to give than to receive." (Acts 20:35).

It's blessed to give and it's blessed to receive. Now apply that in all of life. It will help you in your career. It will help you in your relationships. It will help change the mood in the office where you work. It will be a sure ingredient in your path to success. Anybody who succeeds is because he has some nice people who do so much for him. I think I've done nothing in my life, but I surely have many, many wonderful friends. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

4) Be thankful always, anyway

Then the next simple principle is - be thankful always, anyway . The Bible says to give thanks to God for all things. Carol Aspling, our Children's Choir Director, has a serious heart condition that was perplexing to the medical team. Then someone said to Carol, "I think you should start to thank God for your heart problem because God can do something good with it." So Carol started to thank God for her heart problem and then amazingly the miracle happened. She is healed.

The awesome power of this one word ... THANK YOU

We haven't measured it. We can't calculate it. Catherine Marshall was one of the great Christian saints and writers of our century. Catherine had tuberculosis and finally someone said to her, "You should thank God for your tuberculosis." She said, "Thank God for it? No, I need to pray that I'll have the grace to accept it." And they said, "No. Thank God for it. He can do some good with it that you will never know. There are some people who know you are struggling with this disease. They will be encouraged to deal with their own problems. You are a blessing to them because they know about your pain." So Catherine Marshall started thanking God in her prayers for the tuberculosis and for all the good that God would do through it if she just kept a positive attitude. She was healed very shortly thereafter. She had dinner with us in our home some years later and she said, "I don't think I would ever have been healed from tuberculosis if I hadn't thanked God for it." Amazing!

5) Be generous

It is an amazing thing how only grateful people really learn to be generous people. It is the time of year when the church asks for your support for the good work God is doing in the world today. What should you give? Read your Bible, which tells us to give to God at least ten percent of whatever God allows to come to your hands. If you are really thankful for what you have ... an income ... my goodness, give God what he asks for ... a tenth.

No members of this church have ever done more for us than Vern and Lavon Dragt. They came here when we numbered only a handful of members. While Vern Dragt was in an iron lung due to polio he couldn't earn any money. So Lavon, with three small children, had to go to work, but how could she with her small children? Someone told her about selling Tupperware. She tried and her first week's income was $87, so she gave $8.76 into the offering plate ... ten percent of all the money they earned that week. They have never stopped doing that. Now, all total, their giving is over a million ... far more, in offerings week after week.

Thanksgiving Produces Trust

When you are really thankful, you will not only be generous, but you will be trusting God. Nothing produces more inner security in life than trust. I can preach 'til kingdom come that we need to trust God more. Well, how do we build up trust? You build up trust by becoming addicted to thanksgiving in lip, in life, and in work. Yes. So be thankful to God for all things.

Someone said, "I'm thankful for my mortgage payments, it means that I have a house and I have shelter."

Someone else says, "I'm thankful for the physical pain in my arm and hip. It means I still have my arm and still have my leg."

"I'm thankful for my gray hair. It means I didn't die young."

"I'm thankful for the messy kitchen, the unmade beds, toys and clutter all over the house. It means I've got a family with children."

"I'm thankful for the problems on my job. It means I'm employed and I was chosen. They wanted me. They needed me."

Or, as I shared with you just a few weeks ago about the man who said, "I lost all my savings with the stock of my company that is bankrupt. Now at the age of 72 I have to go back to work. But I'm happier at work than was sitting at home watching TV, so I'm thankful that I'm not able to retire."

Leftovers. You know, my wife has a recipe and she calls the dish "leftovers." I can see it when it comes to the table. I can't tell you all that she has in that big bowl, you wouldn't believe it. A real mixture. And I'm supposed to be thankful for that? I call it "cleaning out the refrigerator" supper. But then I will say to her, "Honey, tonight will you offer the prayer of thanksgiving?" That way I can be honest and sincere!

Then I remember the time when our accountant said to us, "You owe some income tax." I took that as bad news. Our pastor's salary was always so low I didn't have to pay income tax. He said, "Reverend Schuller, be thankful, it means you had an income. Be thankful."

What challenges do you face today? Is it your health? What healing do you need? Do you need healing from something in the body, or do you need a healing in the heart? Maybe it's greed. Most ungrateful people are greedy people. They want more. Is it jealousy? ... Is that why you're not thankful for the achievements you have and the life that you are living? Where do you need healing? If you need healing, be honest enough to look at yourself in the mirror and admit it and then thank God that you can and will be healed.

Lois Wendell, my secretary for fourteen years was a very devoted and faithful employee and friend, like a sister. One day late in the evening she called me and she was crying. She said, "Bob, I've got cancer. Can you come and pray for me?" I said, "Of course." So I got in the car and drove to her home. I didn't have a prayer planned, but this is what came out, not word for word, but I do remember intuitively, impertinently, starting every sentence with the words "thank you." When I was finished she said, "It blew me away how you built my spirit, how you encouraged me, how you've made me positive." Because every single sentence was a prayer of thanksgiving.

"Thank you, God, that we've discovered she has cancer. It gives us time to work on it ...

Thank you, God that when she discovered her cancer she has a strong faith to face it positively ...

Thank you, God, that she has a husband who will encourage and support her ...

Thank you, God, that she reads the Bible and let the right words come out at the right time to give her the hope she needs ...

Thank you, God, that she belongs to this great church and every single Sunday she gets a lift from it ...

Thank you, God that there will be new discoveries to deal with cancer every passing day and that she will benefit from some of these that are yet to be discovered ...

Thank you, God ...," and the prayer went on and on. Lois Wendell lived fourteen more years when she was told she would probably live no more than twelve months!

The awesome, positive power of one word: THANK YOU. Say it aloud ... thank you! And again ... THANK YOU!

Prayer: Thank you, Lord, that we're a part of a world where Christ lives, where the Word of God, the Sacred Scriptures are read. Thank you, God, that we're a part of the world where people of faith live and where we encourage others. Thank you, God, for this ministry that reaches into two hundred countries. Thank you, God, for this great mission enterprise to the world through television. Thank you, God, for the thousands of people who volunteer their services in all different levels without which this church could not do its good work. And thank you, God, for Jesus Christ; He lived! He died! He rose again! He is our best Friend! He is our Savior! Hallelujah. Amen.